36 meters per second
by Kinkycurls
Summary: Contrary to popular belief, Tsukishima did not only have one friend. The thing is, they just haven't met in real life yet. TsukishimaxOC
1. Chapter 1: expect the unexpected

**Chapter one:** _expect the unexpected_

Contrary to popular belief, Tsukishima did not only have one friend.

In the beginning of his elementary school days, Tsukishima, young and unjaded by the stifling harshness of reality, was a lot more cheerful. Back then, he had already started to develop the habit of provoking others out of childish playfulness thanks to his brother, so his friends of the same age, those who could look past his comments and not get unnecessarily worked up, were few. The number of them were countable on one hand, really, but this didn't bother Tsukishima.

After all, Tsukishima's close relationship with his brother, Akiteru, caused them to spend most of their time together. When Tsukishima was free after school, he would go home to play volleyball with his brother, or listen to Akiteru's numerous conquests regarding the sport. When it was competition season, he would go to Akiteru's matches to support him, always cheering for his brother, feeling proud when spectators praised the ace.

When he wasn't spending time with his brother, Tsukishima would hang out with his friends. The most popular activity for boys his age to do in elementary school was to have a competition to catch bugs. Sometimes it would be to see who could catch the biggest number of insects, and at other times it would be "let's see who can catch the biggest one!". Summer was the favorite season for elementary and middle school boys because of the abundance of beetles, and hence, beetle fighting was a common sight.

Unlike other boys, Tsukishima didn't think bugs were cool. He didn't see the appeal in things that could be crushed under a shoe (in the case of a Hercules beetle, a thick, heavy shoe), nor did he find the idea of having two to three beetles ramming into each other particularly entertaining.

It wasn't until a couple of years later, while watching a late night documentary on television, that he discovered he liked large animals more, such as whales and sharks, and another few months before realizing that he liked dinosaurs the best.

Thus, whenever he could, he would choose Akiteru's company instead. As a result of this, and his incapability of making friends, his friendship with others were few and loose. He even owed his friendship with Yamaguchi to the latter's interest in his brother and his brother's volleyball endeavors; it wasn't until two months into their friendship that Yamaguchi had told him that Tsukishima had rescued him from bullies a few weeks prior to what Tsukishima thought was their first meeting.

As someone who found it hard to connect to people, Tsukishima had taken refuge in gaming whenever Akiteru had to study. Most of the time, he would be gaming with Yamaguchi, whom he had formed a close bond with. However, when Yamaguchi could not join him, Tsukishima would play with others online.

One day, he received a friend request, with a message saying that they should team up to monopolize money in the game and clear it together. Tsukishima, having been stuck on that quest for quite sometime, had agreed. Even after teaming up, it took a week for them both to clear the quest, and the time they spent talking over the game's chat log was more enjoyable than Tsukishima would have originally guessed.

Despite having head their separate ways, it wasn't long before they decided to help each other out again, "Momi" requesting for Tsukishima's help, and "Tsukki" agreeing for 20% of the profit the other would earn.

Before he knew it, Tsukishima had formed a sort of friendship with "Momi" whom he found out was a girl of his age. He felt that it was easier to express himself with words behind the protective layer of anonymity that his in-game identity could provide. There were some things he just couldn't approach his brother about without seeming uncool, like what to get Yamaguchi for his birthday, and Momi was his only other confidante.

Their exchanges were often brief, because despite his maturity for his age, he was only 10 and he didn't want to hog Akiteru's computer too often.

However, after Tsukishima's rift with Akiteru, he was quick to cut off his bonds with others. The few friends he had were his friends no more. Yamaguchi was there when it happened, was the first to support Tsukishima, and stick by him despite him becoming drastically cynical and aloof. Tsukishima chose to keep his friendship with Yamaguchi.

Tsukishima also chose to keep his online friendship with Momi. Tsukishima, being afraid to become too trusting or putting in too much effort after what happened to Akiteru, felt that an online friendship would be less personal than one in real life, easier to maintain, easier to get out of should he wish to. A part of him was also too afraid to get to attached to Yamaguchi in fear of getting disappointed yet again, and decided to use his friendship with Momi as a buffer.

The following year, when he was 12, Tsukishima got his own cell phone as a present from his parents, and their friendship had moved from a weekly exchange to a more frequent exchange of text messages. Though they didn't text daily, or send many texts a week (they were both using pre-paid phone cards, after all), they continued this routine throughout their middle school lives.

The thought of meeting Momi in real life had never really occurred to Tsukishima, who felt that their texting and occasional, but sparse, phone calls were enough. If he were to be completely honest with himself, he would have dreaded meeting Momi in real life. Without his knowing, Momi had become someone who he was comfortable with. She knew about his gaming and music preferences, his liking for paleontology, and because she had first talked to him before it had happened, she knew about his previously close relationship with Akiteru and what it had become as well.

However, his friendship with Momi could never rival his friendship with Yamaguchi. They were two entirely different things all together. With Yamaguchi, he admits he is distant and an asshole most of the time, but he does appreciate the friendship they share. With Momi, though, their friendship was a bit more personal, with too much true feelings involved since he didn't feel the need to hide them from someone who didn't even know his real name. He lived in Miyagi, and she lived in Nagasaki, right on the other end of Japan. The trip there would have taken close to 10 hours, and Tsukishima couldn't fathom how much money it would cost to travel there. To 14 year old middle schoolers, they lived in what seemed to be two different worlds, never to meet in reality.

The dread Tsukishima felt, however, stemmed from the fact that should he meet her face to face, then his friendship with her, and thus his vulnerability, would become an actuality.

Tsukishima didn't know if he could handle that.

 _From: Momi_

 _I'm moving to a place far from Nagasaki after middle school._

The text itself was no surprise, for it was no secret between them that Momi's family relocated often due to her Father's job.

 _To: Momi_

 _Where to?_

 _From: Momi_

 _To a high school in the East._

Despite their friendship, Tsukishima didn't know how much it took for the conversation to become too personal. He never asked for anything too specific that would have revealed her identity because he wasn't sure how much was 'okay'. He didn't push.

It was a week before the start of high school that Momi mentioned this again.

 _From: Momi_

 _I'm going to Karasuno High in Miyagi._

 **End notes:** _thank you for reading my first haikyuu! fic; reviews are appreciated!_


	2. Chapter 2: messages I could never send

**Chapter two:** _messages I could never send_

 _To: Tsukki_

 _The monster is in the tower up ahead._

 _Send | Delete | Cancel_

* * *

 _To: Tsukki_

 _Which elementary school do you go to?_

 _Send | Delete | Cancel_

* * *

 _To: Tsukki_

 _I wish I knew what it's like where you live. I catch myself wondering if you live in the city, or maybe you speak with a kansai dialect. I want to know more about you._

 _Send | Delete | Cancel_

* * *

 _To: Tsukki_

 _I'm sorry about what happened with Akiteru._

 _Truthfully, I'm not sure of what to say… no words will suffice in helping you get through this._

 _Send | Delete | Cancel_

* * *

 _To: Tsukki_

 _I wish I could be there for you. You two were close, so it must be hard on you, but I can't help you if you won't talk to me._

 _You should talk to someone, Tsukki, even if it's not me. What about your friend Yamaguchi?_

 _Send | Delete | Cancel_

* * *

 _To: Tsukki_

 _I hope you're alright._

 _Send | Delete | Cancel_

* * *

 _To: Tsukki_

 _This probably sounds uncool but, I'm worried about you right now. You seem different recently._

 _Send | Delete | Cancel_

* * *

 _To: Tsukki_

 _Do you wanna know something? I actually have a bunch of drafts fro long ago that I never sent you. Pretty lame, huh? I should probably delete them soon!_

 _Send | Delete | Cancel_

* * *

 _To: Tsukki_

 _Hey Tsukki, did you know? I've never had many friends._

 _For as long as I can remember, my family has always been moving from city to city because of Papa's job as a business man. The longest we've stayed in the same place was for 2 years, the shortest being 6 months. Because we always move, I don't often have friends in school. There's only Papa, Mama and me, so I don't have any siblings to play with either._

 _Truthfully, I am very lonely._

 _In the 2 years I stayed in Yokohama in the Kanagawa prefecture, my second year of elementary school, I tried to get along well with my classmates. I realized I was actually quite good at making friends. In a short time period, I made three friends, all of whom were girls. At first, I thought they were friendly and I enjoyed being around them. The four of us even bought matching keychains to strap to our bags during our third year of elementary school._

 _But nearing the end of autumn, a nasty rumour about one of the girls had been spread around. Apparently someone said that the father of one of the girls had lost his job, and their family became in debt._

 _No one actually knew who started it, but the three of them thought it was me. Without me knowing, the three of them cornered me in the gym shed and lit the ends of my hair aflame with a cigarette lighter. They said this was just a warning, and that they'd do worse if I tried to retaliate._

 _How uncool I was to have been bullied by girls, right?_

 _Knowing you, Tsukki, you'd probably say that I should have told a teacher, but how shameful it is to be bullied. I could never let the anyone know. I even had to cut my hair short afterwards - how embarrassing._

 _After that, I never spoke to them again. I dared not, afraid that I may unintentionally provoke them. I never got the chance to explain myself either. Just like that, our friendship was no more._

 _If I were to be honest, I was never more glad to move away._

 _You know, Tsukki, maybe that's why I continue to send you emails despite not knowing who you are or what you look like. Because of that incident, I've become fearful of others, fearful of how unpredictable they can be. I'm afraid to approach them, anxious of what they think of me, feeling as though there's always someone out to get me._

 _It's hard to make new friends when you can't help but feel like this._

 _Even more than my fear of upsetting people, though, is my longing to get rid of this loneliness that I feel._

 _Sending you an online message in that game was really a stroke of luck for me. I won't deny that I had requested help from you again a second time just to talk to you more. When you agreed to help me, I was very happy, and even more so when we slowly became friends._

 _Weird, isn't it - for me to be happy about being friends with someone I know almost nothing about?_

 _Even though we exchanged numbers 6 months ago, we hardly exchange emails often... but I cherish it when we do._

 _I'm glad we are friends, Tsukki._

 _Send | Delete | Cancel_

* * *

 _To: Tsukki_

 _This is becoming a habit, but honestly I'm glad that I didn't send you that previous message. It would've been embarrassing if you read it. Somehow, writing you drafts like these has become a comfort for me._

 _Send | Delete | Cancel_

* * *

 _To: Tsukki_

 _When you called me yesterday, I was very surprised._

 _For a second, I thought that you had pressed the wrong button - "call" instead of "email". Then I realized the phone was ringing too long for it to have been a mistake. Luckily, I picked it up just in time._

 _You know, Tsukki, you can actually be caring if you tried. If you were as much of a "unappreciative idiot" you said you were, you wouldn't have called me at 11pm because you had a fight with Yamaguchi._

 _Even if you refused to admit it, you are attached to him. That's the only reason you would have called me so late at night. I wish you could be more honest with yourself._

 _Despite you trying to play it off, I thought the fact that you actually valued your friendship with Yamaguchi was sweet._

 _Sometimes, I don't think you're as mean as you make yourself out to be._

 _Perhaps I am being too idealistic, but I like to think that despite your sharp tongue, you are considerate on the inside._

 _If you weren't, you wouldn't have confronted those upperclassmen who made fun of Yamaguchi without his knowledge during your first year of Junior High. You didn't have to, but you did._

 _Perhaps I am truly being too idealistic._

 _You definitely don't dislike him, and I'd like to think that you care about him, more than you let on. This isn't the sort of thing you'd do, Tsukki, for someone you didn't care for. That's why I hope you will be able to set things right with him._

 _By the way, next time, think twice before calling him "bothersome", even if you didn't mean it. You described him as sensitive, the kind to blame himself, someone with low-self esteem…_

 _You're really mean to call him that, Tsukki. Since you knew how he'd react, it was definitely a horrible thing to do, Tsukki._

 _But I guess you knew that too, which is why you called me with urgency instead of the usual email. You must've known you messed up._

 _I'd really like to think you're not that bad of a person._

 _Send | Delete | Cancel_

* * *

 _To: Tsukki  
_

 _I've decided. I want to be able to tell you how I feel one day, without relying on these draft emails. I hope we will remain friends until then._

 _Send | Delete | Cancel_

* * *

 ** _End notes:_** _thank you for reading! reviews are appreciated!_


	3. Chapter 3: with a probability of

_Author's note: So I guess this is the long awaited chapter where they finally meet. Also, some feedback or critique would be great because I'd like to know what I'm doing well or what I can improve in. _

_Thank you to those who have previously reviewed! It makes me very happy knowing that you like this story as much as I do. If I haven't gotten back to your review or pm, please give me some time!_

 _I hope the characterization is not poorly done here because it's mostly in Tsukki's perspective this time around. Please enjoy._

x

 **Chapter three:** _with a probability of 0.00625_

It's been a week since Tsukishima had started high school, and a week since Momi had sent him that text message. He had hastily typed out a simple 'me too'. Before he could change his mind, he pressed 'send'.

Tsukishima instantly regretted it.

He must admit that for the whole week, there has been a constant gnawing at him from the back of his mind, he feels as though someone is watching him, and maybe he has caught himself turning around to check behind him a few too many times. Maybe his muscles are more tense than usual and maybe he's been more restless than he usually is. If yamaguchi notices anything, he doesn't say so, which Tsukishima is grateful for. He doesn't want to bring this up at all.

In fact, he doesn't want to acknowledge that this is real.

Up till now, Tsukishima's online friendship with Momi was nothing he thought much about. She was just someone with no face, a fake name, the distance between Miyagi and Nagasaki being 1, 411 kilometers. It's a 10 hour journey by train, and maybe he's being a little silly, but Tsukishima never imagined that he would ever meet her in his life. Perhaps when they're older and working, they'd cross paths at train stations - but what are the chances? They'd walk past each other without the knowledge of it.

But right now - she's here. She's here and she's real and she _knows_ things about Tsukishima. Sure they don't know how the other looks, but there are _5 classes_ , _200 students_ in total. He has about a 0.005 chance of meeting her if it were a one time thing, but Karasuno is going to be his school for the next three years.

From his observations in the past week, it doesn't seem that Momi is in his class. Of course, he's making the assumption that

1\. She can draw the link between 'Tsukki' and 'Tsukishima'.

2\. Similar to Tsukishima, she had the characters 'Momi' in her name.

3\. She would react to seeing 'Tsukki' in real life.

Of course there were other assumptions being made, such that Momi is indeed a girl, or that she really is schooling at Karasuno, amongst other things. But to Tsukishima, it made no sense to lie about these, and from what he could deduce of her (that she was at least honest, if not bright enough to lie about herself), he was pretty sure there was no harm in believing them to be true.

Tsukishima thinks he's overthinking this. He's been much too aware of his surroundings, as if at any moment she may appear. He even tensed slightly at the mention of his classmate's name during homeroom on the first day. Her name was Fujisaki Satomi, and mishearing it on his part caused an uncomfortable feeling in his stomach.

It wasn't like Momi was out to get him, but who knew what kind of person she was in real life? So maybe Tsukishima had trust issues, but he's not going to cancel out the possibility of her earnest nature being fabricated. You can never be too careful, he thinks.

Tsukishima doesn't have any secrets that can be used against him, or at least he thinks he doesn't, and that puts him more at ease. The worst Momi could use against him was probably taunts about Akiteru, but the thought alone already causes a fiery displeasure to settle in his chest.

Tsukishima curses himself for being slightly too honest with his feelings when talking to her.

The honesty had first started out as childish innocence when he was 10, and later due to his resignation to the fact that she would never know who he was.

Or so he thought.

Tsukishima hasn't checked his text messages from her in a week and he hopes that assumption number 3 is wrong. Perhaps she doesn't want to meet him either. After all, she's never expressed any interest in them meeting up or even anything that could remotely remove their online anonymity.

…

Maybe she's been lying.

….

When osoji rolls around, Tsukishima has decided that he's had enough of weighing the pros and cons of Momi not being in his class (the pro being that his chances of running into her is less because the only time he's out of class is before and after school, and when he needs to use the toilet, while the con is that there is now a 0.00625 chance of meeting her when he passes through the corridors during curriculum time).

He seriously needs to stop overanalyzing the situation.

After dismissal, he quickly gathers his books before leaving the classroom. Tsukishima tries to appear calm and collected, but there's a certain air of haste around him that causes other students to part for him.

Tsukishima's mind feels dense, like his brain has reached his maximum capacity for that day and it's as though he can't think of anything else anymore. He's so wrapped up in his thoughts that he had forgotten Yamaguchi and had left him behind. Tsukishima's step falters, and he vaguely wonders if he should turn back and wait for him.

A familiar "Tsukki!" rings through the corridors, and Tsukishima should've guessed that Yamaguchi would've taken the initiative to catch up to him.

He turns, expecting to see Yamaguchi's running form coming towards him from the end of the hallway, and Tsukishima predicts that his cowlick will be bobbing ridiculously.

Instead, an unfamiliar lilt stops him mid-turn.

"Tsukki?"

It's unfamiliar, yes, but Tsukishima feels as though he's heard this voice before, like he has _heard_ _it_ from somewhere.

And then he remembers it.

 _Six months ago._

" _H-Hello? Tsukki?"_

" _..."_

" _..."_

" _..."_

" _Uhm, I'm going to hang up now-"_

" _Yamaguchi is upset, and I don't know what to do."_

" _What happened?"_

" _... I might have said some things."_

 _Present._

Tsukishima remembers that voice, he remembers it; it's hers, he knows it is and that means she's standing right there beside him.

He had stopped mid-turn, eyes landing directly on her. It's the first time he's ever seen her, and if he had to describe her in a word, it'd be 'pale'. She's pale, and she barely reaches past his shoulders, and the only other thing that registers in Tsukishima's mind is ' _this is her'_ and ' _she's right in front of me'._

Tsukishima feels anxiety bubble up in him. He hates this feeling, hates how he reacts, as if he's fearful and afraid. He's not afraid of her, definitely not, but he doesn't want 'friendship'. Tsukishima knows what's wrong with him, understands why he's acting like this, irrational as it may be.

But he doesn't want to be lied to again, doesn't want to be disappointed..

So he shuts 'connections' out.

Tsukishima's taunting personality was hardly useful in making friends, and his spiteful attitude towards avoiding disappointment certainly doesn't help.

Right now, in the forefront of his mind, Tsukishima was formulating ways to deal with this situation.

She wouldn't recognize him based on his voice. His voice had gotten a little deeper since that one phone call they had six months ago. There's still an resemblance, obviously, but she has only heard his voice once, and it'd be difficult to make out the similarities with his normally curt and clipped replies. Tsukishima didn't think he'd ever say this, but puberty was actually useful.

This wasn't the time for amusement or jokes, though; Tsukishima's mind was in overdrive.

He tries to think of a way out of this, a viable way to get rid of her. He could act confused, cut her off before she could say anything and walk away. He could rile her up, maybe, as a distraction of sorts. Perhaps she was the kind who tended to be shy - if he walked away now she would just let him.

He's overthinking things again. He's been quiet for too long now, he knows. The anxiety builds, and he knows Yamaguchi has caught up with him by now. Tsukishima can feel the other's questioning guys burning holes into his back, waiting for something to happen.

Those aren't the only set of eyes he feels boring into him.

He feels pressurized. Tsukishima needs to say something - anything, to make an excuse, to leave, to deny - he needs to say _something_.

He feels his mouth open, and the words tumble out before he can stop them.

"You're shorter than I expected."

Tsukishima wants to slap himself.

Those were not the words he had been looking for, and definitely not the words he had been expecting. Those words have left him stunned, but at least he's not the only one who's surprised. If their faces were anything to go by, she and Yamaguchi both looked as shocked as he was. He isn't sure how to save himself anymore, isn't sure if that's possible at this point. What's worse is that she looks as though she wants to say something, and he's drawing up blanks in his brain as to what the best course of action should be now.

So he stops himself. Tsukishima doesn't think. For once, he lets his instinct take control, let's his body move on it's own.

He walks away.

He walks away quickly, so quickly that Yamaguchi has to practically run in order to catch up with him.

He's almost round the corner when he hears that lilt again.

"Uhm, wait-!"

Tsukishima doesn't look back.

x

 _End notes: Thank you for reading and reviews are very much appreciated! You can find fic updates on my tumblr ( writinghomunculus ) or you can feel free to chat with me about Haikyuu! there as well. Thank you very much once again!_


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